From Doers to Equippers
Bill Easum

In our experience, if a church has a staff of 10, two will already be equipping people, two will not believe it’s possible in this church, and six are open to the possibility. Two need to be fired outright—and two or three of the six who are open to the possibility will make the transition with a lot of help.

So what kind of help do doers need to make the shift to equippers?

The shift begins with what happens in the staff meeting. Does the staff focus on programs, calendars, and problem, or does the staff focus on people? I use the phrase, “You need a to-be list more than a to-do list.” Everyone has a to-do list, and it gets longer every time a person sits in a staff meeting focused on programs.

When a staff meeting focuses on the to-be list, questions from the lead or executive pastor go something like this:

* Whom did you meet this week who’s ready for leadership?

* Who are the new guests you met this week, and what did you learn about them that the group should know?

* Who’s new in the small group ministry? Does each small group leader have an apprentice? If not, how can we help?

* How are the past month’s new members doing? Are they finding a place to belong and become involved?

* What about our small groups? Are they growing, and who needs our help at the moment?

* What is each of you doing to nurture your own spiritual growth? (People can’t give what they don’t have.)

* Does each of you have 10 people you’re mentoring? If not, what do you need to make this happen?

I strongly believe that we get back what we look for. People who tell me that the people in their church just don’t want to volunteer are really telling me they don’t spend any time looking for volunteers. They’re usually too busy doing the ministry themselves.

People who spend energy looking for new people so they can help them find their place within the body of Christ always seem to find them.

Another great book you can buy here by Bill Easum:

This blog entry was inspired by this video. (music by Plumb)

The number of teenage girls who have been admitted to hospitals for intentionally hurting themselves has risen by a third over the last decade.

Emma's mom first noticed the cuts when Emma was doing the dishes one night. Emma told her mom that their cat had scratched her. Her mom seemed surprised that the cat had been so rough, but she didn't think much more about it.

Emma's friends had noticed something strange as well. Even when the weather was hot, Emma wore long-sleeved shirts. She had become secretive, too, like something was bothering her. But Emma couldn't seem to find the words to tell her mom or her friends that the marks on her arms were from something that she had done. She was cutting herself with a razor when she felt sad or upset.

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Cutting often begins on an impulse. It's not something the person thinks about ahead of time. Shauna says, "It starts when something's really upsetting and you don't know how to talk about it or what to do. But you can't get your mind off feeling upset, and your body has this knot of emotional pain. Before you know it, you're cutting yourself. And then somehow, you're in another place. Then, the next time you feel awful about something, you try it again — and slowly it becomes a habit."

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Natalie, a high-school junior who started cutting in middle school, explains that it was a way to distract herself from feelings of rejection and helplessness she felt she couldn't bear. "I never looked at it as anything that bad at first — just my way of getting my mind off something I felt really awful about. I guess part of me must have known it was a bad thing to do, though, because I always hid it. Once a friend asked me if I was cutting myself and I even lied and said 'no.' I was embarrassed."

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Sometimes self-injury affects a person's body image. Jen says, "I actually liked how the cuts looked. I felt kind of bad when they started to heal — and so I would 'freshen them up' by cutting again. Now I can see how crazy that sounds, but at the time, it seemed perfectly reasonable to me. I was all about those cuts — like they were something about me that only I knew. They were like my own way of controlling things. I don't cut myself anymore, but now I have to deal with the scars."

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It has been said that people who cut, do so to see if they can still feel. They have become numb because of all the mental and emotional pain they have endured in their young life.

My hope is that this blog reminds us of the very serious issue of cutting that many teens face today. Let us work to help our students find relief from their pain through Jesus Christ, the only One who truly loves us unconditionally and understands us even more than we understand ourselves.

This is a great resource for Student Pastors who wish to address the issue of cutting with their students.